Pride is a confusing time for me
Pride is a confusing time for me. I live in the intersectionality of being a white man who feels like white men need to shut the fuck up and give the mic to black women and being a genderqueer autistic unicorn who has a lifetime of being pushed to the side and “disciplined” professionally whenever my authenticity makes people uncomfortable.
So there’s a perpetual oscillation. Because whenever I go full boss-diva, I come across as a self-important white man and people are repulsed by it. So there’s always a question of whether queer pride is actually for me or not.
Am I supposed to just be a dad to everyone in my life and a Baptist deacon who doesn’t “make everything about me”? Do I ever say, “Actually my pronouns are they/them”? Do I have to perform queerness adequately for you not to see me as a white man? Do I need to wear a dress and makeup?
So happy pride I guess! If it’s really about being authentic, then this is my authentic self-expression right now.
Love your picture friend. I think all the labels people put on us we should maybe just let slide off our backs like water on a duck. Who do we identify as well that’s perhaps not something we have to share because for one thing it’s - hopefully for me anyway, continuously evolving as I draw closer to the Source of Life and Love. I hope by my words and actions to portray love but if others don’t connect or feel it all I can do is pray for them not be ashamed or hide or change who I am. Pride is not something I want to have I want to have humility. Pride has often caused me to demand instead of give. Peace